I got to cuddle a four month old baby today.
Anyone that knows me knows that this is my most favorite thing in the world.
I took Little Miss R into my arms and a peace immediately came over me. We walked back and forth talking to one another. The room was full of people, but in my world, it could have easily been just the two of us. Her sweet fingers curling into mine, her beautiful baby scent encompassing me….I was in baby heaven.
Since I was little, I’ve been chasing the very “until” of being a mom. Yet at 37 years old, this dream; this “until” hasn’t been met for me yet. It’s something I pray for daily. And the more I pray, I wonder if God is calling me to foster or adoption or both.
Every time I get to cuddle a baby, my heart is content…a contentment that I honestly can’t seem to find anywhere else in my life. So when I get to snuggle a baby, I wonder if God is affirming who God created me to be; a woman who deeply loves babies and has wanted to be a mom her entire life.
I continue to lift my prayers to God and trust in Gods call for me. I’m also very thankful for colleagues and friends who allow and have allowed me to have precious baby time with their babies.
For in those moments, when a sweet baby is snuggled into my arms, I find healing………………………
But more than anything I find hope!