Sitting on a bus, on our way to a regional drama contest, my friends would not let me speak. That morning I woke up with hardly any voice and in mere minutes we would be heading to Bismarck and the regional one act play contest. Looking back, I still laugh at the ways my friends found themselves helping me to preserve my voice. Our voices help us to stand up for what is right, but what does one do when one feels like they have lost their ability to speak or that the well has run dry?
Earlier this summer, after an unexpected change at my last job, I found myself searching and seeking to find the words; to find my voice in regards to how I was feeling. It was a time when I desperately needed to speak and share my own thoughts and feelings yet it was a time when I found myself with faith laryngitis. It was a time when every time I came to the writing well, it was found bone dry. And then I found myself on the top of a mountain; Estes Cone in the heart of the Colorado Rocky Mountains.
On that mountain, something magical; no, something incredibly holy happened. My friend Scott pointed out that there was a chapel laid right before our very eyes. There was water–a Baptismal font. There was a rock pile; a holy alter. There was half of a cross which Scott quickly made into a whole cross; a makeshift cross now set on the mountain. Scott went ahead and waited for me as I took some time to pray. I began to listen to one of my new favorite albums Ellie Holcomb’s Red Sea Road. As the words poured into my ears, the tears quickly began to trickle down my face. It was as if all of a sudden the well waters opened up and would no longer stop flowing freely. I was being given holy life-giving water right there on the top of that mountain.
I didn’t realize it at the time, but I was being transformed. That night, I penned a poem about being on the mountain. And for the days following, the words wouldn’t stop flowing. I finally had my voice back…and it was as if I didn’t ever want to lose my voice again.
In the days, weeks, and months following that holy moment, I have found myself pouring out words. I have found myself seeking to tell my story. I have found myself once again returning to those things; writing, speaking, and praying that once gave me life and are once again giving me life!
The last several nights, I have found myself on Facebook live streaming prayers; praying for the people of Texas, praying for the Savanna Greywind family, and simply praying for whatever is needed. I have found my voice again and I don’t want to lose it. I don’t want to let it go. I want to continue to drink from the life-giving water that only Christ can give. The life-giving water that quenches like none other.
Come to the well, my friends, and drink from that very same life-giving water!
Today, you will find me linking with these lovely ladies: Kelly and the RaRa linkup, Jennifer and Tell His Story, and Kristin and Porch Stories.
I wonder at this. Will God stop the flow again. For His reasoning and ways? I know you’ll remember this time if He does and recall His goodness. He is a mysterious God. But a good one.
I will remember this time!
I smiled at the term “faith laryngitis”- I have definitely been there, but when we’re feeling dry, the life-giving water is exactly what we need. I’m glad you found your voice again! And I am a big fan of Ellie Holcomb’s Red Sea Road too!
Isn’t it such a great album?!
Such a beautiful experience, and so lucky your friend noticed the possibility!
Yes and I’m so glad he noticed too!
What a beautiful testimony! How I would love to visit that place or at least see a picture. Thanks for sharing!
Ooh Kelly, I wrote about it and posted pictures back in July. You can read the post and see the pics here. http://prayingontheprairie.net/3665-2/
this is beautiful and all about God’s faithfulness and yours! I’m still trying to find at least a tiny voice to express my near-total devastation over losing the friends and life I expected to resume at least on some level, to some degree. I still rationalize all day long about “how much worse everything could have been,” but the grief and sorrow have invaded my body. If I got as many hits on my main blog as I do on my lectionary blog, I might try again to write more. Maybe you’ve given me courage? thanks!
Thanks friend! I hope that my words have indeed given you courage.
This was beautiful and so encouraging. As people who love words it can be so confusing to have none. I love the story of the mountaintop and the fact that you are live streaming prayers for Texas and Savannah’s family. Thank you for being a light in this world!