Always Waiting

I think I’m a pretty patient person most of the time as our world is full of places where we wait. I think that I am pretty good at waiting; waiting in line at the grocery store, at the post office, etc but when it comes to waiting for those deep desires of my heart; waiting for those untils to come true, I’m horrible at waiting. And some days are harder than others as I wait….today has been one of those days!

Another dear friend announced her engagement tonight. I’m excited for her and I know that she has waited for a long time as she too has found herself continually waiting. She is so happy. And as she reminded us all in her Facebook post announcing her engagement, the waiting is totally worth it. Most days I can believe her, but I still have a hard time trusting in God’s promises when I’m still chasing my very own own untils.

I feel an emptiness in the pit of my stomach. As I wait, I get caught up in the lies of the enemy. Am I good enough? Am I valuable? Am I worthy? Too often those lies attack me and I think I’m not enough or valuable or worthy. But the truth is that God created me; created each of us as beautiful individuals who are “fearfully and wonderfully made.” God sees me waiting and promises to never leave or forsake me or YOU!

Yet I still find myself standing here waiting….waiting for the deep desires of my heart to come true. A lot of days I find myself still waiting and wondering if perhaps I’ve been passed by in that waiting line. And when I think I’ve been passed over, my heart sinks even more and that pit in my stomach becomes even larger as I wonder if I’ll always find myself standing in that waiting line.

I’ll admit that it is a truly difficult place to find myself especially when those who have been waiting around me are now no longer waiting, It kind of feels like being picked last for Phys Ed and I honestly dislike that feeling very much. I don’t want to be caught standing all alone waiting to be a wife and mom forever!

Yet God is an amazing God who isn’t going to leave us waiting forever. In fact, God promises to walk with each of us especially in the midst of our own waiting. On days like today, when it feels like I’m always waiting in line for my deep desires to come true, I’m choosing to cling to that very promise; that God  will never leave us or forsake us. It is a promise that reminds me that there is always hope and that waiting does come to an end…just not always the way we expected it to.

I am linking up with these lovelies today–Holly and Testimony Tuesday, Kelly and the RaRa linkup, Jennifer and Tell His Story, and Holley and Coffee for your Heart.


Sunday Blessings 117

(1) Leo finally won his Oscar!

(2) YouthWorkers with my faves!!

(3) Voxing with TM

(4) A text from MW showing me that he got to hang with our friend CL today. So jealous! Miss you both!!!

(5) Voxing with KA

(6) An awesome mail day; ShutterFly photo books and fun mail from my blog friend LM!

(7) Receiving my copy of my blog friends new book.

(8) Visiting with members at our Lenten supper.

(9) Baby snuggles with baby Rhoda

(10) A gentlemen stopping to visit with me at the nursing home.

(11) Bible study at the nursing home

(12) Great LCM board meeting

(13) Metigoshe No Such Thing as a Free Lunch lunch.

(14) FMF Twitter party

(15) A relaxing day off

(16) Banana bread and lemon bars sent home with me.

(17) Leftover lasagna

(18) A sweet lady letting me have the item she claimed at a party. So so sweet of her!!

(19) A text from Aunt P

(20) Fuller House

(21) EG saying to me after worship, We have matching bracelets. Yes we did. Gave bracelets out during my children’s sermon.

(22) A great skit during worship–so fun!!

(23) A great baptism of a teenager

(24) Christ Lutheran meatballs with RRS.

(25) Celebrating our volunteers with their service milestone.

(26) Gorgeous Springlike weather

(27) A nice PLN (post liturgical nap)

(28) Getting to read outside for an hour on this 72 degree day.

The Good News

 I am linking up for the Five Minute Friday. The FMF is hosted by Kate Motaung on her blog Heading Home. Today’s prompt is “news”! 

I have a degree in communications with an English minor and an emphasis in Journalism. During my internship in college, I realized I loved doing feature stories but very much disliked doing the hard news stories. I would much rather get to know a person than write about the latest happenings. In realizing this, I also realized that perhaps God was calling me to somewhere else and led me straight to seminary.

Even to this day, I love watching and reading the feel good stories, but dislike the usual news. In fact, most days I don’t even pick up a newspaper or watch the latest news cast because of the ugly stuff that is happening in our world; murders, war, fighting, etc. It seems like the news is always full of such hatred and horrible things happening in our world.

I would much rather hear the good news of a friend’s book being published or a book contract signed or friends finalizing their adoption. On Thursday nights, I would much rather turn to my Twitter feed where I will find fun and funny news. Tonight our topics ranged from where do you go to write and what is your beverage of choice to food to LuLaRoe leggings. This is the news that puts a smile on my face. This is the news that reminds me that all is not lost or horrible in this world.

The truth though, my friends, is that the ultimate truth is found in the good book; in the good news of Jesus Christ who came into the world for each and every one of us. This Good News brings promises of hope and peace and love and grace. This Good News reminds us that this is the news that has the ultimate say over everything that is happening in our world. This Good News is the news that I want to cling to each and every day!

Echos of Words that Rise Up

“In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God.”–John 1:1 (New Revised Standard Version)

“The Word was first, the Word present to God, God present to the Word. The Word was God, in readiness for God from day one.”–John 1:1 (The Message)

Words are powerful.  They have the ability to carry us away to beautiful places. They also have the ability to tear us down but more importantly, build us up. My blog friend Jolene Underwood started a movement called Rise Up Writers. In her words, “This movement is a call for Christ followers to use words well, whether as an entrepreneur, a fiction writer, a blogger or simply as one who engages in the world of social media.” This week, in her first link-up, she asks us “What does it mean to rise up with our words?”

Ever since I was little, I have loved words; learning how to spell them, learning what different words mean, how to use them properly, etc. My mom said she often could hand me a pen/pencil and a piece of paper and I was a happy camper. I didn’t need my toys I just needed these simple things that would allow me to share my words; my thoughts; my stories.

As I have grown older, I have realized the impact of our words and our stories even more. I am reminded of words from well-known author Brene Brown. Brown states “The bravest thing you’ll ever do is share your story.” Oh how true those words are. In October of 2014, I participated in my first ever Write 31 Days challenge. My series embodied my families story as I shared Being a Daughter: 31 Days of Mental Illness. I never imagined the ways that writing our story down in words would impact me. I have met some amazing women and started lifelong friendships because I had the courage and bravery to rise up and write down our story. And because I rose up, these individuals were able to rise up and share their stories with me.

Yes, I will admit that there are days that I have wondered if I have anything of value to say. In fact, just last week, my feelings were hurt when I wasn’t chosen for a launch team that seemed like everyone around me had been chosen for me. In moments, many of my blog friends reminded me of the power of my words and how I do indeed have something incredibly valuable to say. Sometimes I just need that reminder to be able to “rise up” with my words.

In fact, before Christmas, I felt a nudge from God to write a book. Now I’ll admit that ever since I can remember, I have wanted to write a book. But I never imagined that it would be the book that I am currently writing but it is where I believe God is calling me to “rise up” with my words. This book is about “Chasing our Untils.” Until I get married; until I am a mom; until (fill in the blank here). This book is a book that I finally began writing because God gave me the strength and courage to rise up with these words; words that will hopefully bless many.

But most of all, I want my words to reflect God and God’s love for all God’s people. I want my readers to know that the ultimate Word is found in the promises of John 1:1. God was the Word who became flesh and lived among us. This Word is the Word that ultimately enables us all and gives us the power to “rise up” with our own words. It is my hope and prayer that my own words in this space and also in my book always do that.

“Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echos are truly endless.”–Mother Theresa

Indeed may our words grounded in faith always “rise up” and echo the love, grace and mercy of God’s love for all of God’s people today and every day!

What I Learned in February

It’s time for the monthly linkup of what I’ve learned over the past month. One never stops learning.

(1) One is never too old to act like a kid! Mickey Mouse, Roller coasters, lots of laughter and so much more. While in Anaheim for the ELCA Youth Ministry Network Extravaganza, my friends and I spent Super Bowl Sunday at Disneyland. It was my first ever Disney anything experience. I laughed so much and got my picture taken with Mickey Mouse.

(2) Writing a book is hard, hard work. But I believe will be totally worth it. I’m thankful for an editor friend who agreed to read my first couple of chapters and give me some thoughts. I believe he is helping make this book better. Some days I really want to write but other days it is so hard to write.

(3) Seven years is way too long to not see a dear friend, but good friends pick up right where they left off. My dear friend Liz and I hadn’t seen each other for seven years. We were dear friends at seminary. It was a joy to see and spend time with her. We spent hours hanging out and it felt like we had been together the weeks before. We picked up right where we left off. And I already miss this friend!

(4) Blue Apron is my new favorite way to make meals for myself. My friend CT introduced me to this company. I helped her make a meal. Then she shared one of her free meals with me. I got my first box free and am now getting a box weekly. This company sends fresh ingredients that you cook with. I feel so grown-up making these meals. And I am eating healthier too!

(5) As an adult, not being chosen for the team still hurts! Oh how true this is. As a middle and junior high student, I hated being picked last but I often was. I know that my words have valuable. But when I wasn’t chosen for one of my fave writers launch teams and everyone else around me seemed like was, I indeed felt hurt!

(6) Coloring is still a great stress reliever even as an adult. Yep…I bought myself an adult coloring book and awesome colored pencils. It’s a great way to end the day and is totally a fantastic stress reliever.

(7) North Dakota is an incredible place to be!!! It is a place where communities come together in the midst of senseless tragedy. It is a place where violence is often overshadowed by love for one another. North Dakota is my home. It is a place that will always have my heart. It is a place where the beauty of the prairies is breathtaking and soul filling. It is a place where the sky is as far and wide as the eye can see. But most of all, the people of the ND are amazing caring loving people. In the midst
of a senseless tragedy, they came together in ways that are amazing. (Read more Honoring A Man in Blue)

I’m linking up with Emily and What I’ve Learned, Holly and Testimony Tuesday, Kelly and the RaRa linkup, Jennifer and Tell His Story, and Holley and Coffee for your Heart: